liberation

what a feeling of utter and complete liberation!!
i got my drivers licence today
passed the written driving test ...
i am now officially ready to come out on the road...yayyyy

The Libertine!!

Countess: anyone can drink.
Rochester:(Johnny Depp) yes. but few can match my determination.

Johnny depps done it yet again. For those who have nt seen this movie as yet pls dont waste a second. it is a brilliant piece of performance, art work, acting, casting, filmography, set design, and above all Johnny depp. He delivers the severeness of the dialogues, their wit, their cynisim with unbeatable passion.

it is the story of John Wilmot a poet, a cynic and debauchee, set in a sombre 17 th century England. it is about a man who cared for nothing, not even himself. its a portrayal of his last few days when his drunken and lechorous ways get the better of him. hair raising acting, intense and absorbing. watching the movie ure thinking do i hate him, do i sympathize with him, do i pity him.

its an emotionally moving work of direction and acting. and i think the movie seems to have done justice to John Wilmots work, his perverseness, his hatred for life, his lack of faith, his anger, his lust and his sad end.

".....that is my prologue, nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty, you were not expecting that i hope.I am John Wilmot, Second Earl of Rochester and i do not want you to like me."

a little something for a little someone

we prepared for you.....
we waited for you...

we talked about you endlessly...
watched how you grew inside mommy...
kicked and wiggled and danced...
u were happy ...
we were all happy...
we watched how mommy would nt stop eating.. mommy fell in love with daddy even more...
if she could she would eat him too...
she looked beautiful...
and daddy looked a little lost and confused but happy...

we heard your heart beating...
jumped with joy at each beat...
saw you curled up inside mommy....
could nt wait to have you with us...

and you have now arrived...
too bad khala missed it...
she was too far but shes with you and loves you...
and cant wait to cu and hug u and kiss u...
spoke to mommy and daddy...
their excitement was contagious....
mommy wants everyone to be pregnant....
but thats mommy...

N & O (my closest friends) had izdeyar 30 th march'06
hey guys love u and miss u lds...
wish i was there
this goes out to that time at jalal bhais khoka, O n my talks, and N n her tantrums...

what r friends for?

a friend send this to me the other day... there s too much truth in it ;)

vicious cycle of questions

'o' levels:
science or commerce?
it' ll decide what path your life takes...whole lotta crap!!

'a' levels:
grades?
u get into a good uni and u r set for life...

university:
ru done? married? what still not married?

graduated:
working? married? what your 25 working and still not married?

married:
independent house? with in laws?how many cars? servants? pregnant? kids?

a year after marriage:
what still no kids? beta/ friend everything k?what u doing with your life?

urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

exits and arrivals

exits
29 th march '06, Karachi, Pakistan

they say the house was visited lately. the guest had wings which hovered over the door.
he knocked with a gentle tap. so gentle that even the host did not wake up.
he did not mean to wake anyone up afterall it was the middle of the day and it would b rude to do so. so he tiptoed his way through the room of the sleeping man evading the eyes of his wife who stood beside him in the room and invited him over. the sleeping man accpeted the kind invitation and walked out the door.

he left behind a woman whose life revolved around him, black n white photographs of them together, pictures of his children and grandchildren, his books, a house which resonated memories of their lives together, his body which at the age of 80 had begun to show signs of deterioration--- his whole world. they say the courage of life is a less dramatic spectacle than the courage of the final moment, but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tradegy.

f's nana left the world quietly in his sleep. he was buried the same day at maghrib.
"nones death comes to pass without making some impression, and those close to the deceased inherit part of the liberated soul and become richer in their humanness"

arrivals
dec '05, NY, u.s.a.

just a few mths back in another part of the world an embryonic seed had grown inside his daughter. she was the bearer of life. and finally dec of '05 she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. they named him omar.

exits and arrivals
29th march '06, TO, Canada
30th march '06, NY, u.s.a.

as soon as we heard the news f decided to take aunty to meet his sister in NY. the 7 hr long drive was quiet and restless. on arriving aunty n b khala met and shared their sorrow, talked at length about aba jaan and nostalgia took over. sorrow slowly turned into laughter as happy memories were shared. but the one tiny soul which brought life to this sad moment was omar. unknowingly, without any deliberation or effort he brought a smile to everyones faces. his smile, hs eyes shining, looking, observing and absorbing, his feet kicking at the joy of life, his tiny hands reaching out. this newness of life, this smell of freshness, this ray of hope, this little face of heaven, this little arrival of love and life at the exit of another. the sun afterall sets to rise again, autumn is followed by spring, and the stirring of life is bringing death alive.

this goes out to my nana who parted from us Feb '04, to my dadi, to my chachas who dies a very youg death and all those loved ones who have left us. we remember u for all that u lived for, what u stood for and what u were willing to die for. May your soul rest in peace. ameen